Where do I belong?

It is very backwards and forwards in this job. Some days I am very happy with how things seem to be progressing and other days I get very upset and frustrated with the way I am treated. Recently I have been finding it very difficult as the changes in the company structure have begun to take effect and I have still been told absolutely nothing. Many people in my area and department have begun training for new roles. The documentation team, which I am a part of and work with two times a week, are merging with the customer support department (or at least that is what I have heard from the gossip around the office). I have not been involved in any meetings or given any kind of information about where I stand. I now sit upstairs, alone most of the time, as the rest of my department has moved downstairs and I have still been told nothing at all, or given any reassurance, guidance or support. This is incredibly frustrating as I feel so overlooked and completely neglected. It just confirms my fears of not being important within the company and being “the intern”. I am so eager to make the most out of this placement, but I feel like I am not being given the opportunity because no one looks at me as a valid member of staff, or at least my supervisor doesn’t. Small comments, like in our meeting with my tutor - where she said I am not expected to make decisions - push me to my limit, as I do make decisions every day. No one told me what structure I should follow, I decided that. No one tells me exactly what to do on a day to day basis, I have to make decisions. Every time I send out documentation, or ticket flights, or analyse direct mailers or check invoices, I am making decisions. But still I have been marked as “limited attempts” at decision making. I feel like I was mis-sold this job and my role, as they made me believe I would be treated as a full time employee, given the same responsibilities and trust – which would include making decisions. But I have definitely not been given this. 

The feedback I received after my meeting from my supervisor also has been a point of serious annoyance and confusion. I feel like my supervisor doesn’t have any idea of how I am actually doing because I feel like she pays no attention to me whatsoever and so it annoys me that she thinks it’s okay to only give me “good” in almost all categories when I have been trying as hard as I can with the resources and training I have been given. I understand that I cannot expect to achieve excellence in all categories right off the bat, like knowledge or self-reliance, and am happy to work towards improving these in the coming months but some criteria I really couldn’t understand. Criteria like appearance - which is not something I can really improve over time, and I have simply been following the dress code I was given when I started, but still only given a ‘very good’ mark - just show me that she just simply wouldn’t given me excellent because she doesn’t want to. And the attendance and punctuality where Ana and I come to work at exactly the same time every single day and yet Ana gets excellent from her supervisor but I only get good. It makes no sense to me and due to my competitive nature and need to succeed, I hate that I seem to be getting downgraded for no apparent reason. 

They knew, when hiring me, I was coming in as a student and the contact between us meant that my supervisor had an obligation to actually supervise me and give me more guidance and support than an average employee. I wouldn’t mind not having this if I actually felt like I belonged and I feel like I was fully involved like everyone else. But I am not, and I am doing the best I can with the resources I’ve been given but I don’t feel like this is in any way helping me to develop my knowledge and skills.

On a more positive note, Ana and I attended the World Travel Market last week and it was quite the experience. At first everything was very unorganized as has been the trend for us since starting our placements. We arrived and had no one to meet/follow so wandered a little lost and helpless around all the stalls. It was really cool to see the effort all these businesses put into their stalls, and I was shocked at how much it looked like they would have had to spend to be part of the exhibits. But it was great to see, with lots of people dressed in traditional clothes, freebies along the way, small performances and key note type speeches scattered around ExCel London. We wandered around and explored all the “countries” until finally we got a message from one of the assistant product managers who met up with us. She was shocked at how little organisation had gone into our visit from the businesses side and said she was so sorry that she didn’t know, because she would have been more than happy to have us shadow her for the day. But was still a great experience - from about 13:00pm until 17:00pm we attended meetings with her, talking to suppliers and learning about the importance of this event – which I think really benefited me in terms of my knowledge of the industry and business. I liked seeing the exchange between us and the business we work with, and made me eager to grow and develop myself to a point where I could get more involved. 

Its just hard for me because I know that these kinds of opportunities only become available to us when we properly chase our superiors for them. But we shouldn't have to constantly be asking and almost begging for them to pay attention to us, support us, supervise us and involve us in things they should already be involving us in as their placement students. I desperately want to do well here, but if I am never given the opportunity to do this, I don't know how I will be able to find the positives in this placement.

Progress

There has been quite a bit of progress made over the last month. I am starting to settle (I know I say that every time) and this time I feel like the departments are beginning to accept me into their “groups”. I felt very ostracized at the start as I was the youngest, had just started, still a student, and I think most employees looked at me as a kind of temp, someone they didn’t need to make much of an effort with. With all the restructuring going on, I almost felt as if some of them resented me for just coming in and having this job security – for this year at least – while they were having to re-apply and interview for jobs they may have had for up to eight years. I think now however, as I start to meet more people around the office, and everyone realises I am a fully-fledged member of the team, the have begun to include me in conversations and I no longer feel like a hassle or nuisance anytime I have a question. 

Ana and I were taken out to lunch last Friday by the sales manager, in an attempt to welcome us into the business, a couple months late perhaps but the thought was nice.  It was a great opportunity for us to talk about our thoughts and concerns in a less formal environment. He was very understanding and happy to listen to our worries. I think it showed me for the first time that they are actually interested in having us as part of their team and interested in our development as students and within in the business. We talked about being interested in attending the world travel market, something we thought as tourism placement student would have been a definite. We also explained that we would love to be more involved in meetings and business strategy so we can get a more well-rounded understanding of the business practises as a whole – which would really benefit our reports. Jokingly bringing up the idea of us going on a FAM trip, had a positive reaction but at this point is still looking unlikely – worth a try, don’t get unless you ask right :P

When we got back from our lunch however we were left slightly disappointed as they told us that actually it was unlikely that we would be able to attend the WTM as they need us around the office. Disappointing as most other students in our industry have been allowed this opportunity. When we had our tutor meetings on Monday however, this was brought up and in the end we have been allowed to attend! 

There are a lot of positives in this entry, as things are definitely getting better. One of the biggest developments has definitely been the marketing responsibilities. I initially started off doing a lot of data entry and sending wedding brochures and such, which was fine at the start as I tried to find my feet, but I am so grateful to the marketing team for actually taking the initiative to include us in tasks now with more importance. I have recently been trained to work on banner campaigns, an online predictive advertising form, which allows me to be creative and will actually make a difference. I spent a long time working on banners advertising Tobago holidays, and loved the software and the chance for me to “play around” with different effects and techniques.  The idea that my creations might actually be used to advertise our product also gives me a sense of fulfilment and finally I feel as though I am contributing to the success of the business. I was also trained in Direct Mailing analysis recently which analyses the effect of our mailing campaigns. Three times a year Tropical Sky sends out brochures to everyone on the mailing list, as this has a cost involved it is important to be able to see what benefits come from this and how effective they are at encouraging more bookings and adding to the business profit. I have learnt so much more about the use of excel which I think will really come in handy in the future and also it allows me to get a much better idea of the power of marketing. 

I think due to my meeting with Kate, I have shown some form of initiative which has encouraged her to allow me to take on more responsibilities. Another positive for me has been the advancement of my opportunities within the docs department which Kate asked for me to be trained into. Yesterday I was taught how to complete QVR reports and was trained in the use of the online flight platform AMADEUS. I have really enjoyed this as I fell this was a missing piece of the puzzle. I understood all the documentation side of things but had no idea how flight or issuing tickets or anything worked. I feel as though this training has really helped to tie everything together and I can see now how each part fits into the overall final product and connects each department together. This has finally allowed me to feel as though I chose the right placement and become more comfortable in my role. QVR reports show the list of flights for booking which are on a ticketing deadline. When sales reps book flights they get put on hold and are held at a booking deadline on AMADEUS. If these booking go ahead then by running the QVR report we are able to see which flights need to be issued before they expire, to save the client from losing out on the flights and perhaps losing money – I like the importance that follows this role, as by completing it correctly you are in turn allowing clients to get the best deal and can really positively impact the business. After running the QVR reports I was shown how to issue the tickets. Due to the TSR platform being upgraded and connected to AMADEUS, issuing tickets is quite simple! All you need to do is make sure the PNRs match TSR and all the details are the same, then you can simply click the issue tickets button and it’s all done.  

I am much happier this week with all the progress I’ve made, all that’s left now is to increase my responsibilities within the accounts department and I’ll finally feel like everything I expected has been reached. There is of course always room for improvement and I am still a little worried about all the restructuring as I know this will end up changing a lot of what I am doing now; but if I do end up having more tasks, I will not be disappointed. I like to be challenged and love to learn new things to help my own personal growth. All I can hope for is that I will be included in the changing departments and trained properly on anything new I may need to do.

After my meeting with my tutor and supervisor I am also aiming to be more proactive and assertive in the coming months and if I ever need anything not be afraid to ask for it. I want to become more independent and confident so that I can develop my skills and be able to adjust to new directions. I’ll aim to increase my knowledge of the business itself – background information, strategies, tactics, and sales figures – as well as looking into tourism theories I missed out on being solely an IHM student so I can better understand how it all works. But all in all, I am feeling much more positive about my place in the company and hope that I can continue to improve and grow for the rest of my time here.